One of the wonderful perks of being part of a Christian publishing family is all the great Christian authors I get to meet. When I saw this blog by my friend Sheryl Holmes posted on her site earlier this year, I knew I had to share it here on The Addiction Connection blog.
Sheryl’s ministry reminds me of Psalm 34:18-19:
The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the LORD delivers him out of them all.
I am grateful the Lord is strengthening and enabling Sheryl to reach out and help other parents.
But I was wrong, in part.
Sure – some of them do certainly happen in those places… but there’s a lot that do not.
I never knew, until after my son overdosed and we had a look at his phone.
Two years prior to his death, he was introduced to his first substance by another athlete at school; typical, and hey – experimentation in high school has been going on for years and years – not one generation has been able to avoid it; sad, but true.
Two years after that first introduction, was another story.
Where the drug deals go down may surprise you… it did me; I was angered when I found out.
“How did I not see?”
Like an innocent sheep with the wool pulled over my eyes… I was dumb, unaware, and never saw the wolves at my back door – literally.
Cars would pull up alongside the driveway for a few minutes every so often, every few – 5 days or so, and when we asked, “Who was that?” My son would say, “Just a friend who stopped by to say Hi!” And we believed him, oh so naïve.
Exchanges on the bike trails… Oh wait! I had seen my son’s car sitting there in the parking lot several times before, odd afternoons and early evenings – and he said, “I was just chillin” – meeting up with “some friends”… and I believed him, oh so naïve.
The friend card – (*sigh*) – we all want our kids to have friends, so we don’t question too much, and we give them space (assuming that all the friends are good friends) … and we relax when they are just chillin’ with a friend… at least I did, oh so naïve.
Little did I know… there were deals being made, and drops going on …
in the mailbox,
in the woods,
by the dumpster…
just yards and a few miles away from home, oh so naïve.
Where the drug deals go down (?) is right in your backyards, in your neighborhoods, and on your sport teams in your idyllic little towns; the wolves are at your back door… literally.
Post my son’s death, one source told me, “Oh, I had people drop right at the front door while my parents where watching T.V. – they never suspected a thing!”
My only point to this post today is DON’T BE NAIVE my fellow parents!
My hindsight is 20/20, just as the saying goes.
Take note when your kids’ friends “stop by” in a habitual manner, every so often, and don’t stay very long at the end of your driveways, in parking lots, or alongside your house, or your neighbors house. Take note when your son or daughter often slips out of the house for a few minutes for no apparent reason, no matter the time of day. Note the patterns, question the nonchalant-ness, know who these friends are…
You don’t want to be caught unaware, where the drug deals go down.
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