I hear people and even counselors say, “Her perception is her reality.” While that is a half-true statement, it is not wholly truthful.

People believe lies. People deceive themselves. I do it, too, sometimes! None of us are immune to falling prey to self-deception and the lies of Satan. We “think” these lies are reality though they are not. We get deceived. Just ask Eve (Gen. 3).

For this reason, we need “open rebuke” which is “better than hidden love.”

Proverbs 27: 5-6 states: “Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.”**

Think about this for a minute. Is this what the culture teaches us? Is this what the world tells you is good? Open rebuke is better than hidden love? Faithful are the wounds of a friend? No, the culture teaches the opposite!

The world would have you believe that anyone who disagrees with you is in error and that you need people to agree with you – encourage you, build your self-esteem, and ideas like that.

Counselees often think they are right though their lives are falling apart. Our job is to point them to the reality of Christ as THE answer to their needs and problems, including addiction, anxiety, depression, control issues, and the like. His character is revealed in the truths of the Holy Scriptures – the Bible! We need to know Him and His great love for sinners like us!

A real friend speaks the truth in love to you which is what you and I need. We need truthful friends who really love us by saying the hard things. We need biblical counselors who are knowledgeable of the Bible and point you to God’s Word under the leading of the Holy Spirit.

If we don’t have friends like that, then our perception may become our reality but it is truly NOT reality! We may miss God’s best for us if we stay in our perceived reality and never come to a knowledge of the truth.

We must pray that the Holy Spirit removes the barriers that blind us to the truth. We must pray that we would humbly receive God’s truth no matter what our fleshly pride tells us.

-Mark (learning to embrace the truth even when it “hurts” temporarily)

**The Holy Bible : English standard version. 2001 (electronic ed.) . Good News Publishers: Wheaton.